Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Why I Write Sex Positive YA


Hi. My name is Monica, and I have some not-so-groundbreaking news for you.

Teens are having sex.

Yes I know, this isn’t a shocker. It wasn’t that long ago when we were teens (well, it was sort of a long time ago for me, but we won’t focus on that), or there are those of you reading this who currently are teens. And I know I haven’t forgotten how many of my fellow classmates were having sex while I was in high school. Some started way too young (seventh grade, eighth grade = TOO SOON). My daughter is a freshman in high school, and I can’t imagine her being ready or mature enough for sex.

But they’re out there, her fellow freshmen (and older, of course), and some of them are doing it. Or they’re breaking up with their girlfriend because she won’t do it (true story, just happened to a couple my daughter knows – they broke up a few days ago as I write this). As my daughter said, he wanted the sex, and his girlfriend said, uh, no.

So he dumped her.

Now, I think that’s a pretty lame reason to break up with someone, but honestly, the girl lucked out in the long run. You should never feel pressured to have sex by your significant other. And you definitely shouldn’t have sex because everyone else is doing it (or so they claim), or because you think you should. There is no set timeline for when someone should have sex, but for some reason (trust me, you don’t need to grow up that fast! Enjoy your youth), the pressure is always out there.

In my upcoming YA book SAVING IT, Josh and Eden are seniors in high school, and they’re best friends. He’s getting antsy because high school is almost over, he’s had some serious relationships, but he’s never actually done the deed. Josh figures he needs to do it and get it over with, so he’s not a virgin when he gets into college. He recruits Eden into helping him find the perfect girl to do it with.

As they both go in search of the perfect girl though, they start to realize that maybe they’re perfect for each other. That maybe they should take the risk and shift their best friendship into something more. Something serious.

Something that includes having S-E-X.

They realize this because they care about each other. Josh and Eden love each other and you know what else? They actually trust each other too.

And that’s huge.

You know what makes sex extra awesome? When you trust and care about the person you’re with. See how I don’t even use the word love? Loving someone makes it even better, but that can’t always be the case. I think the key word in deciding to have sex with someone is this: TRUST. Do you trust that person? Do you trust them to be responsible? To care about your needs? To protect you? To not blab to everyone after it happens?

Having sex is huge no matter what the age, but it becomes this big, BIG deal when you’re a teen and contemplating potential sexual partners. There’s a responsibility there, an agreement between two people when they’re going to become intimate with each other. And if you trust that person in every possible way, then trust me (ha ha, see what I did there?), the moment will be that much better.

SAVING IT

Eden: Josh Evans and I have been best friends forever. He knows all my secrets, and I know all of his. So when he randomly asks me to help him lose his virginity, I sort of flip out. That’s a question that sends your mind to places you’ve seriously never considered before. Like, you know. Having sex. With your best friend. Except Josh doesn’t want to have sex with me—he wants me to help him find a girl. A nice girl who’s funny and smart and cute. Except he already knows a girl just like that…

Josh: Eden Sumner is my best friend. So of course she’d be the person to help me find my perfect match, so I can drop my V card before I head off to college. Except the more we search, the more I realize that maybe the right girl has been by my side all along. I don’t need Eden’s help in finding me a girl to love. I’m pretty sure I’m already in love with Eden. But now she thinks I’m only after one thing…with anyone but her.

Disclaimer: This Entangled Teen Crush book is what happens when American Pie meets Friends with Benefits. It contains two best friends, plenty of angst, and lots and lots of sex talk. Reading this might have you looking at your best friend in a different light!


Author Bio:
Monica Murphy is the New York Times, USA Today and #1 international bestselling author of new adult, young adult and contemporary romance. Her books have been translated in almost a dozen languages and has sold over one million copies worldwide. She is a both a traditionally published author as well as an independently published author. She’s also known as USA Today bestselling romance author Karen Erickson.

Author Links:
Snapchat: @msmonicamurphy

1 comment:

  1. Love this! What a great, positive message for teens. I do have to admit I never had any proper sex education in school. I learned it from romance novels! :D

    ReplyDelete

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